I'd Cook for My Teacher
If I cooked hot lunch for my teacher,
I would start out with rattlesnake stew.
Then I'd serve her a centipede salad
And a tall glass of milk mixed with glue.
Next, a seaweed and jellyfish sandwich,
For dessert, an a-chooberry pie.
When she finally finds out what she's eaten,
I hope the old bat doesn't die.
Text © Bruce Lansky, reprinted from If
Pigs Could Fly... published by Meadowbrook Press.
Illustration © Stephen Carpenter. Any copying or use
of this poem or illustration without consent is unlawful.